Confessions of a Drunken Groupie, And One High on Rockstar

Can I go nowhere with you? Wanna go to Zellers? Okay. Liam from Two Hours Traffic needs to lean over and say "skidgy skidgy skidgy". I like fourteen year olds with braces. I see the ski hill, we should stop here and go through the woods to it. I'll just climb a tree every now and then and make sure we're in the right direction. Maybe we could just ride some deer to the ski lodge, they'll know the way. We're going to see Two Hours Traffic.Woo, woo, woo, WOOOOO! We're totally gonna get lost. I can't find the hole to my Rockstar. There's a sketchy man whose eyes went in polar opposite directions, he talked to me, I feel creepy. Don't touch anything, let's just get the hell out of here. Lock the doors, lock the doors! People really shouldn't shoot dirty looks when they see you changing your shirt in the car......in daylight.....in a parking lot. We need a video camera in the car........and our own radio show......where we can talk about the idea of having our own radio show. Joel Plaskett was there....but he's shorter and fatter......no wait, someone just stole his jacket...Nnnoooooo! No more buying jackets, jackets are bad. You are to jackets as I am to shoes. Lets devote a room in our house to Two Hours Traffic.....and one to hello kitty. And skulls. Walkin by a stoner "Hey how are you ladies tonight?" Good.....just keep walking. Mad search for the only PEI liscense plate in a parking lot full of Bluenoses.....like a needle in a haystack. Wanna caffeine high? Just inject in your eyeballs. What do you think those truckers are doing? Poking. Is this the old road? Looks pretty old to me, got a few holes and patches. Hey there's the store! Now where's the park? Remember to hold the flusher down for a while. We need to go to Needs.......for slushes....Sackville needs a Needs. Don't laugh I'm gonna try to put it in. He's touchy. Just ask him where the bathroom is. No. Just do it. You know where the old road and the new road meet? You take the old road. Ssshh....shut the hell up bag. How come every time we're creepy the Beatles are randomly playing somewhere? I wish Justin Timberlake would stop stalking us with his sexy back. There's a lot of flies in here...1234567...and a million over there. There's two in a glass of pop I had last night. Alec pointed at us...we got "the look" from Derrick and Liam....nothing like magnets on a van......we're like this, crosses fingers......mmmmmm......yeah